The Wiley Workings of a SooooperGenius

Mon, 30 Jul 2007 18:28:59 GMT

Hi, guys!

We here at work got back into the Harry Potter world today with a post DH-story about J.K. Rowling. She apparently took questions during a 90-minute web chat about what she thinks happened to her characters between the end of the story and the epilogue, and here it is:

BTW, we were kind enough to put a spoiler alert in the story so I can't help but do the same thing here:

¶ Rowling said the world was a sunnier, happier place after the seventh book and the death of Voldemort.
¶ Harry Potter, who always voiced a desire to become an Auror, or someone who fights dark wizards, was named head of the Auror Department under the new wizarding government headed by his friend and ally, Kingsley Shacklebolt.
¶ His wife, Ginny Weasley, stuck with her athletic career, playing for the Holyhead Harpies, the all-female Quidditch team. Eventually, Ginny left the team to raise their three children _ James, Albus and Lily _ while writing as the senior Quidditch correspondent for the wizarding newspaper, the Daily Prophet.
¶ Harry's best friend Ron Weasley joined his brother, George, as a partner at their successful joke shop, Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. Hermione Granger, Ron's wife and the third person of the series' dark wizard fighting trio, furthered the rights of subjugated creatures, such as house elves, in the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures before joining the magical law enforcement squad. The couple had two children _ Rose and Hugo.
¶ Luna Lovegood, Harry's airily distracted friend with a love for imaginary animals who joins the fight against Voldemort in the Order of the Pheonix, becomes a famous wizarding naturalist who eventually marries the grandson of Newt Scamander, author of "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them."
¶ And what Muggle, or non-wizard, song would have been played at the funeral of Albus Dumbledore, the most brilliant and talented wizard the world had ever known?
¶ "Surely 'I Did It My Way' by Frank Sinatra," Rowling told her fans, referring to the song "My Way," written by Paul Anka but popularized by Sinatra, among other singers.

I start screenwriting classes in Sept! We'll see where this goes, huh?
On a completely different note, I managed to flood our basement this weekend by using hooking up a defective water hose to a lawn sprinkler, in the process soaking my copy of Spawn #1. Of course, I also destroyed the carpet and part of the wall, but MY SPAWN #1 is ruined!
Woe is me.

Thu, 01 Jun 2006 17:25:57 GMT

It's a slow writing day here today, so I'm going to play too!

Set your iPod to shuffle and use the songs that come up for each part of your movie soundtrack:

Opening Credits: "Barcarolle" Jacques Offenbach
Starting out with classical music, huh? Must be an opening scene of wide fields, expansive forests and rolling hills leading up to a house in the country, with herds of horses galloping about grassy hills and a lazy puppy napping on the porch ... I mean, gotta use classical music for the nature shot, right?

Waking Up: "Limelight" T.I.
Ooo, and I'm famous too! I like this movie already!

Falling in Love: "Mojo Hand" Lightnin' Hopkins
Okay, first bad sign. I'm falling in love with a woman I need to do some voodoo on make sure she says faithful. Hmmmm. But hey, I know voodoo! That's got to be a plus, right? And I got a love spell right here ...

Fight scene: "Through The Storm" Yolanda Adams
Gospel music for the fight scene. Either I'm getting my ass kicked so badly they're having to pray for my survival, or it's one those slow motion scenes where you can see the spit fly out of the mouth as the blows land. On second thought, it just doesn't work, does it?

Breaking up: "You Make Me Feel Like Dancing" Leo Sayer
A happy breakup? It must have been the little woman who was kicking my ass.

Getting back together: "Always And Forever" Heatwave
With her? After that ass-kicking? Wow. But hey, the song says "Always and Forever." Why can't I get rid of her?

Secret Love: "My Man" Billie Holiday
And she had a secret lover, one of those bad boys, on top of being able to kick my ass? Why didn't she just leave? I mean, voodoo isn't real anyway, right?

Life's okay: "This Will Be" Natalie Cole
Ok, I get it. This is one of those "beware of what you ask for" movies. She's stalking me, talking about an everlasting love. I'm going to dump her. If she doesn't get the hint, I'm going to really have to do something nasty to her.

Mental breakdown: "Ain't Got No/ I Got Life (Take 3 )" Nina Simone
Yep, I'm cracking up. She's ruined me. Burned my car, shot my dog, ruined my credit, and now she had me committed. I'm counting all the things that I don't have. Call the guys in white coats. All I got is life. Guess I should be happy with that, but somehow I'm feeling a little crazy.

Driving: "That's What Friends Are For" Dionne Warwick with Elton John, Gladys Knight & Stevie Wonder
Oh, good. Some friends have come to rescue me from this insane asylum. You know, the food here wasn't that bad.

Flashback: "I Am A Man of Constant Sorrow" John Harford
Okay, instrumental music here. That means I'm telling my friends about how horrible the insane asylum was. It's all in black-and-white, and it's horrible. Really? They made me eat Jell-O. Don't people know what's in that stuff? What's that? She visited me in the loony-bin? What's that funky looking doll she's shaking? Why didn't I immediately remember this?

Partying: "Love Me In A Special Way" DeBarge
Oooo, a slow dance at the party. That means things must be looking up for me on the romance front with another woman. "No, my brother. You've got to get your own."

Happy dance: "Body And Soul" Etta James
Hmmm, not really jumping for joy music. Maybe it's a happy slow dance? That's it! The woman I've been pining over the whole movie is now in my arms and singing to me. Yes! I knew it would turn around.

Regretting: "Thank You For The Music" ABBA
That damn woman who kicked my ass and threw me in the insane asylum trashed my piano, damn it! I won't miss her, but she could sing. I'll take that with me as I move into my new life.

Long night alone: "Harlem Shuffle" Bob & Earl
Okay, I'm out purging her from my system with a little boogieing down at the juke joint. I'm a movin' to the left, a movin' to the right, just jamming my old life away.

Death scene: "Pink Cashmere" Prince
Oh, my God. She died. I left her at home while I was out doing the Harlem Shuffle, and my ex came by and something happened. It was that voodoo love spell from the beginning of the movie. It backfired and that's why the ex has been stalking me and making my life a living hell the whole movie. It's all my fault.

End credits: "Chain of Fools" Aretha Franklin
Perfect ending. She's not really dead. She's coming back. She says she'll be with me, forever ....

Man, that turned dark quickly, huh? Got to the end, and only had to change three lines to make it all fit. Yeesh. Gotta lay off the horror books.

I don't know whether to be worried or not?!

Thu, 09 Mar 2006 19:05:20 GMT

I've watched only a couple of episodes, but I don't know if I want to think that I'm her!

You scored as President Laura Roslin. You may be ill but you have a job to do. Fate has put you in a powerful position by accident, but it turns out you are damn good at it. You are no warrior, but in the political arena you are without peer.

</td>

President Laura Roslin

88%

Capt. Lee Adama (Apollo)

69%

Number 6

63%

Dr Gaius Baltar

63%

CPO Galen Tyrol

63%

Tom Zarek

50%

Lt. Kara Thrace (Starbuck)

44%

Lt. Sharon Valerii (Boomer)

25%

Commander William Adama

25%

Col. Saul Tigh

13%

What New Battlestar Galactica character are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Sun, 12 Feb 2006 20:00:22 GMT

Spoilers for HBP.

Ron fingered the spine of “The Art of Kissing” on the bookstand for a couple of seconds before quickly putting it back on the shelf. “It’s got to be a book, right? What else would Hermione want?”

Harry shook his head sadly as they navigated around the Valentine’s Day displays in the book store. “So inexperienced in the ways of the world. She’s a girl. Go with the flowers and candy, mate."

“And a book.” Ron insisted.

Harry and Ron spent the next few minutes debating whether he should buy “The Science of Love,” “How To Say ‘I Love You’ in 100 Different Languages” or “Love: A History of the Word.”

“So,” Ron hesitated as he and Harry walked down a fresh aisle in the bookstore. “You getting Ginny anything?”

The relationship, or lack thereof because of Harry’s insistence that he and Ginny should stay as far apart as possible to help keep her safe from his Death Eater enemies, was still a small sore spot between the two friends.

Ron, frankly, thought Harry was being a bit of a jerk. “Like Death Eaters won’t kill Ginny simply because you’ve broken up with her! “ was his last word on the subject as they packed their bags in the Gryffindor Tower. By unspoken agreement, they had avoided the topic since.

Harry looked down at some fresh scuffmarks on the floor. “I can’t, Ron. Buying her a showy Valentine’s Day gift would be like putting a fresh target on her back.”

Ron, likewise, took time to carefully examine a book on football on a nearby shelf instead of looking at Harry. “Well, even if you’re not going to buy her flowers or a card, get her something. Like you said, you know how girls are. Don’t make her wait all Valentine’s Day and then have nothing show up. She doesn’t deserve that, man.”

Harry looked up thoughtfully. “No, Ron, she doesn’t. I’ll take care of it.” He then smirked. “Lots of experience with waiting all day for a valentine, hmmm?”

Ron grinned back. “Shove it, you. At least I got a girl.”

Harry slapped Ron on the back. “But not a gift. Pick something already, and let’s get to a florist.”

“Ronnie’s got a girlfriend, Ronnie’s got a girlfriend,” Ginny sang teasingly as Ron sat in the Burrow’s kitchen, all thumbs as he tried to get a red ribbon tied around a book, a box of chocolates and some tulips so Pig could head off to Hermione’s house.

“So, did you get anything?” A rapidly reddening Ron quickly changed the subject as Ginny sat down at the kitchen table with him.

Ginny tied a perfect bow on Ron’s chocolates and smiled to herself at his choice of “The Art of Kissing” before binding them to the flowers with her wand. “Some chocolates from Mum and Dad, and a couple of cards from some people at school.”

“Is that all?”

Ginny looked up at Ron. “Nothing from Harry, if that’s what you mean. I haven’t heard from him in the last few weeks.”

“He hasn’t talked to you at all?” Ron looked indignant.

“Not since you two went to London. Thanks for reminding me, dummy. ” Ginny flounced up the staircase toward her room.

A chastised Ron called up a “sorry” behind her as Ginny turned the corner toward her bedroom.

She froze as she heard a small rustle in her room, and slowly raised her wand as she shoved the door open. Her eyes caught the tiniest movement at her open window, and she rushed over just in time to see the last of a snowy white wing curl around the top branches of a nearby tree.

On her bureau in a small vase was a glowing red rose. Next to it, wrapped in pulsating pink paper, was a small square object and a note. Ginny unwrapped it and looked amazingly at the small square mirror in her hand. She picked up the note in her other hand and read it.

“Just because we can’t be together doesn’t mean we can’t talk whenever we want. If you want to speak to me, just say my name into it. I have the other one with me. You’ll appear in my mirror, and I’ll appear in yours. Happy Valentine’s Day.”

A smile blossomed onto Ginny’s face as she stretched out on her bed. Holding the mirror close to her face, she could feel a slight heat _ though whether it was from her or the mirror was debatable. “Harry.”

The mirror began to glow.

For Challenge #6, "Star Trek Episode Titles"

Sat, 31 Dec 2005 05:37:16 GMT

Part Two!
I was wondering what they meant in HBP when they said Amelia Bones died nastily ...

“Given your previous losses, I’d have thought you would have been more amenable to my lord’s offer,” Lucius Malfoy smiled as he pressed his sizzling wand down on Amelia Bones’ outstretched hand, drawing a muffled scream from the paralyzed minister. “Really, who could better contemplate the consequences of refusal than you?”

“Your petty amusements waste my time, Lucius,” Voldemort hissed as he hovered over Madam Bones, who was lying prone in the middle of her living room, having been stunned and captured by the Dark Lord and his minions.

“Yes, my lord,” Malfoy bowed, and sauntered over toward the living room’s bar, where Macnair and Goyle were already rummaging through the many bottles.

Voldemort bent silently over Madam Bones, the smell of burning flesh mixing grotesquely with the coppery tang of the blood she had already spilled from Malfoy’s ministrations.

Voldemort locked his gaze on Madam Bones, a flicker of satisfaction in his yellow snakelike eyes. “You would be a most appropriate servant to my cause, Madam. Proof that all could be united under my rule, despite the unpleasantness of the past. A simple memory charm, and tonight’s confrontation could be forgotten. A second charm, and the pain of your losses are numbed forever.”

Despite her paralysis, Madam Bones shuddered as Voldemort ran his wand around her forehead and down her cheek in a sickening caress.

“Your mind is too strong to be controlled easily. But having someone of your level at the Ministry at my side would be beneficial, especially considering no one would ever question your loyalty. I would also … regret having to exterminate such a long line of noble pure-blooded Wizardry. But that is what your refusal would bring, dear lady.”

Voldemort tapped his wand on her lips. “Your choice?”

Madam Bones gulped down a couple of deep breaths, and then defiantly spit toward Voldemort’s robes. “Never!”

“You dare! ” He pointed his wand at her as the spittle settle near his feet. “Crucio!”

Madam Bones screamed.

“Crucio!”

“Avada Kedavra is too good for her, my lord,” Malfoy smiled contently as he poured firewhiskey from a crystal container into a goblet as Voldemort kept repeating the Cruciatus Curse on her. “It’s far too … quick for someone as insolent as she. You, my lord, should make an example of her.”

“An example, yesss,” Voldemort stepped back and looked down at his sobbing and shuddering handiwork. “So people know that even an Unforgivable death would be merciful to those who dare defy Lord Voldemort.”

Voldemort slashed the air with his wand, and a corresponding gash tore through Bones’ robes and her skin at her midsection, eliciting another full-throated scream from her. A second slash led to blood pouring from her forehead and a third stroke stained the carpet red under her leg.

Voldemort kept slashing until there was little left except a bloody mess. “Goodbye, dear lady. Tell your brother I said hello.”

He aimed his final slash at her throat.

For Challenge #6, "Star Trek Episode Titles"

Fri, 30 Dec 2005 02:33:22 GMT

Four day weekend coming up, so I'm going to try something new. Hope it works!

Lucius Malfoy shook his still-smoking hand and glared at Amelia Bones, who was standing majestically on the other side of her living room.

At her feet were two hooded and whimpering Death Eaters, whose wand hands were also sizzling. One had a trickle of blood dripping through his death's head mask, and the other was clutching an oozing wound on his leg.

Not a hair on Madam Bones’ head was out of place. "I'm surprised, Lucius, really, that your so-called master thought I could be taken so easily," she said quietly. “Though I expected more of my Auror guards, I must say. Did you have them killed before your friends rushed in, Lucius?”

A flick of her wand, and the three Death Eaters levitated into the air, arms petrified to their sides and mouths frozen. Their eyes darted about the room as Madam Bones carefully examined her now-cracked monocle, repaired it with a tap of her wand and placed it back over her eye.

She then bustled about her living room, looking for a second like the aging lady she was. She carefully picked up the now-cheering silver- and brass-framed pictures of her loved ones that had spilled off the mantles and end tables during the battle.

Many of the lamps that had earlier cast comfy glows about the room had been struck by wayward spells, and the living room was now cast in dark shadows that seemed to dance with the flicker of the fireplace’s flames.

Madam Bones hesitated for a second on one gold-framed picture, that of a man, woman and their children who were waving up at her frantically. Time seemed to stop for her as she looked at the waving family, and once she had placed the photograph back in its place of honor on the wall, Malfoy could see the waves of anger radiating off her like heat.

“Did your friends come to Edgar masked, Lucius?” she said quietly. “Did you offer him riches and glory if he became a Death Eater, and then have someone hiding in the shadows kill him and his family when he denied you? Maybe it was one of your mates here. Let's see their eyes, and I can tell.”

She smiled at the fear in Lucius’ eyes as she easily unmasked Macnair and Goyle and looked into their eyes. There was nothing elderly in her expression as she took a couple steps back from the three of them, wand sparking slightly at her side as if feeding off of her hatred.

"The third-string," she sneered. "You lot couldn't defeat a bunch of children in the Ministry, yet you thought you'd beard the lioness in her den, hmmm? Do you know how many years I’ve been preparing for an attack like this? Especially after what you lot did to Edgar?”

She raised her wand. "You should have known, it would take nothing less than Voldemort himself to bring about my death."

"Ask and you shall receive, Madam Bones," a voice hissed from the room’s darkness.

A flash of red, and the world went dark.

To be continued in "A Taste of Armageddon, Part Two" ...

For Challenge #3, When We First Met

Sun, 04 Dec 2005 00:05:28 GMT

Rita Skeeter knew from birth that she was destined to be a star. The problem was, no one else seemed willing to accept the idea that she was bound for inevitable glory.

So she decided early in life that she’d make the wizarding world accept her fate, one way or another.

So what if Sarabella Trencher really wasn’t a Death Eater, but just a creepy old lady with too much time on her hands and an aversion to children in her properly manicured lawn? Rita got a picture and profile in The Daily Prophet out of turning her in before Mrs. Trencher was released from Azkaban.

At Hogwarts, she excelled at almost everything she tried. Of course, the fact that other students were foolish enough to study _ and she did extremely well at finding other ways to get excellent grades _ was their fault, not hers.

It was Gilderoy’s idea to add an embellishment charm to their Auto-Answering Quills. That pretty much took care of all of the schoolwork, and once he started following her around like a lovesick puppy, well, that took care of her grades in Charms. And Transfiguration? She knew she’d excel in that from first year, of course.

Yes, Rita Skeeter always knew she was one step ahead of the crowd, and today was supposed to be no different. No one else was supposed to know that The Daily Prophet had a reporter opening yet (influential daddies were so useful, she thought) and she planned to make sure that there was no need for any other interviews.

That’s why the sight of Barnabus Cuffe sitting across from her in The Daily Prophet’s lobby annoyed her so much. He was chatting up the reception witch when Rita arrived, but appropriately fell silent when she entered the room.

The reception witch waved her over to a seat on the other side of the lobby, and offered to go get her some butterbeer, leaving the two of them alone in the lobby.

A good offense was always the best defense, she thought as she glared across at Cuffe.

“You wasting your time, you know,” Skeeter sniffed from her side of the room. “This reporting job is mine.”

Cuffe said nothing.

“I’ve heard of you, Cuffe. You came up with The Serpent Strikes newsletter. Not a bad piece of work, but nothing the least Ravenclaw couldn’t have come up with.”

Cuffe said nothing.

“I’m what they need here. I’m smart, I’m creative, I’m willing to do whatever it takes to get ahead.” Rita crossed her legs, while in her mind laughing as she watched Cuffe’s eyes silently follow her hip-length boots.

“I can get in and out of places you can’t,” she leaned forward and stared past her blonde bangs directly into Cuffe’s eyes, “and I can get stories you’d never be able to. I bet you, in 20 years, I’ll be running this newspaper while you'll still be trying to get in the door.”

Cuffe said nothing.

Satisfied that Cuffe would now be useless in his interview, Skeeter sat back in her chair, crossed her legs again and smiled over as she saw the reception witch heading their way.

“Mr. Cuffe, your father will see you now.”

Cuffe stood up, smiled at the witch and headed into the office without a word.

Rita’s jaw dropped. “His father?”

“Editor of The Daily Prophet.” The reception witch looked pityingly at Skeeter. “Research isn’t your strong suit, is it, sweetie?”

Rita slumped back in her chair, and began shredding her resume scroll.

“Just a minute, dearie,” the reception witch said. She looked around conspiratorially, and beckoned Rita to come closer. “I’m pretty good at Legilimecy, and I get a good feeling from you. You won't get this job, but I might have something else up your alley.”

The reception witch shuffled through some papers, and proudly handed a small want ad across the desk to Rita. “This’ll be in the paper next week. It might be more your speed.”

“Columnist wanted. Active imagination a must. No experience necessary. Picture required,” Rita read aloud.

She beamed at the reception witch. “You know, it just might be.”

For Challenge #2, Difficult Questions

Tue, 29 Nov 2005 03:02:31 GMT

I know it's a little late, but here's my next contribution.
I have a good excuse for being late, though, having just suffered through a toothache and an unfortunate goat shooting all during Thanksgiving week (don't ask )...

Setting: Pre-SS

The first owl Hermione ever really noticed was being rudely chased around their living room by her broom-wielding father.

The owl, of course, was greatly insulted at this and dropped her Hogwarts letter in a bowl of gazpacho before taking a bloody swipe at her father and escaping up an unused chimney. So no owls.

A rat was completely out of the question. During her first visit to Diagon Alley to buy her school things, she caught her mother looking rather disdainfully at a small red-headed boy chasing down a rather shabby-looking gray-tailed specimen down the street, trailed frantically by a similarly-redheaded man who could only be his father.

The older man finally grabbed the boy by the scruff of his neck _ the boy had caught the rat by its tail so Hermione felt no sympathy for him. The rat, however, was squealing and scratching as the boy tried to unsuccessfully wriggle away from his father. One unfortunate twist of the boy’s arm, though, sent the rat sailing through the air and into Mum’s purse.

She screamed, the rat squealed and the purse was flung across the street. The nice man retrieved Mum’s purse, apologized profusely and smiled at Hermione before vanishing into the crowd, angrily chastising his son for letting the rat _ Scatters, she thought she heard _ get away again.

The next day, she found a box of rat poison in the shopping bags after Mum’s weekly trip to the market. So no rats.

Daddy kept goldfish in a tank at the office, and had offered her one as a pet more than once. But magical creatures need freedom, the books say.

“Introduction to Hogwarts: A History” said some students kept toads or spiders, but there was no way she’d sleep in a room with a roaming tarantula, she thought. And a search for magically-inclined puppies in “Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them” was to no avail.

A cat would be such a cliché. According to “Magical Theory,” a cat was a perfectly acceptable magical creature, but she could see the other Hogwarts students laughing now _ the Muggle-born child thought she needed a cat to be a witch, they’d say. Better no pet at all than to provoke more laughter from her mates than absolutely necessary.

She curled up on her white poster bed; her new schoolbooks nestled on her legs. As she flipped through them for the third time that night, Hermione thought she could hear purring. When she closed her eyes, Hermione thought she could feel some warmth.

Books had always been her friends, Hermione thought, and maybe that’d be enough. For now.

For Challenge #1, Genesis

Tue, 15 Nov 2005 18:17:09 GMT

my contribution, a Hermione fic set pre-Goblet of Fire ...

Mrs. Granger looked again at the letter sitting on her oak desk. It hadn’t changed, which actually was unusual for something coming from one of her daughter’s friends.

“Hermione, dear, tell me again what Quidditch is?”

Hermione bustled about their tidy living room, stoking the fire one minute, stroking Crookshanks the next as she waited for Mr. Weasley to pop out of the fireplace. “Well, Mum, think of it as soccer on broomsticks. And this isn’t just a regular match. It’s the World Cup!”

Mrs. Granger folded the parchment carefully and placed it back on her desk, sitting her reading glasses on top. She watched her daughter pace around their piano and over to the grandfather clock to look at the time, and then back around her steamer truck and Crookshanks’ carrying case to plop down on the couch in front of the fire.

Smiling quietly to herself, she took off her coat and walked over to sit next to her daughter, who was almost trembling with impatience to start her upcoming vacation.

“It should be fabulous, Mum. Leprechauns and veela and wizards and witches from across the world, and other students from schools are going to be there, as well as all of my friends from Hogwarts. And we’ve got great seats, thanks to Ron’s dad.”

Mrs. Granger stroked her daughter’s bushy hair, enjoying her enthusiasm. “It was nice of the Weasleys to invite you, dear. Do be sure to tell them thanks.”

“I will, Mum.”

“And, dear?” Mrs. Granger slipped her hand into her purse and pulled out an envelope of her own. “Invite your friends over here next holiday. Your father and I don’t see enough of you these days.”

“Over here?” Hermione hesitated, thinking about what the neighbors would say about the sudden increase of owls a visit by Harry and the Weasleys would mean.

Mrs. Granger frowned slightly. “We might be just Muggles, dear, but we’d like to know our daughter’s friends too. And I’m sure we can find some way to entertain some teenagers, wizards or not.”

Hermione grinned at her mom, thinking of the fun she, Harry, Ron and Ginny would have while her parents were at the office. “I know you can.”

“Your father and I picked something up for you and your friends if you decide to invite them over.” She handed her daughter the envelope.

Hermione ripped it open and pulled out four tickets. She looked at them, and began to laugh.

“I know, I know.” Mrs. Granger began to giggling herself. “They’re a bit over the hill. But your dad got them from a chap he did a couple of root canals on. We actually went to see them down at Wembley ourselves when we were dating.”

“I think Genesis reunion tour tickets are perfect.” Hermione hugged her mom. “Harry will like ‘Invisible Touch.’”

Tue, 03 May 2005 18:31:40 GMT

I admit it. I'm a MacAddict.
Bought my new PowerBook yesterday with Tiger and decided to go pick it up during lunch. I then proceed to spend much of the rest of the day thinking about my new Powerbook, playing with my new Powerbook or thinking about playing with my new Powerbook. Sigh.

Not overwhelmingly impressed with Tiger yet, but I can see how it could be useful down the road. Haven't really had chance to use Spotlight, Dashboard or the new iChat AV yet, so don't now how good those features are yet.

But I am impressed with how the new Powerbooks look and feel. Wow. The 15-inch Aluminum is heavier than my old 15-inch Titanium, but the speakers inside it are so much better, and it's a lot faster and not as flimsy-feeling as the older one. But I'm keeping the older one so I can use it as storage and maybe a server somewhere down the road, since it runs both OS 9 and OS 10. The new ones can't run OS 9, and I really don't want to give up my old software, just in case.

Haven't had chance yet to play with the SuperDrive or burn any DVDs, but I'm really looking forward to it.

One small gripe, though. They tell you you can quickly transfer all of your files from one computer to the other with the Firewire cable. I couldn't, and Apple couldn't tell me over the phone in a two-hour conversation how to make it work. Luckily for me, I have a 20 G Firewire hard drive that I could use to transfer all of my music from one computer to the other. Took a while to figure out why it wasn't working, though. It was that retractable Firewire cable that we were trying to use with it. I changed the firewire cable to a non-retractable one, and poof. all of the music transfered with no problem.

Tonight I'll add all of my programs back to it and we're off and running. No excuse not to finish writing my stuff now...

Mon, 25 Apr 2005 13:58:08 GMT

And here's the final time out of the 382 participants: I finished #342 at a time of 38:45. According to the timing chip they make you wear around your ankle, I was running a 12:29/mile pace. Not bad for my first race!

I was totally whipped for the rest of Sunday, though. Ate breakfast at IHOP after the race, did a little grocery shopping, spent the rest of the day in bed or on the couch. But I finished! Yay!

Thu, 21 Apr 2005 22:25:52 GMT

Pray for me.
On Sunday morning, at about 7:45 a.m. Eastern Daylight Time, I will compete in my first track event since 5th grade.
It's just a 5K. It's only 3.1 miles. It's a mostly flat course down a beautiful stretch of the Potomac River.
But I think I'm having anticipatory pains already. My knees hurt, my joints ache and my back is cramping. And I'm still two days out!
It shouldn't be too bad, though. I've run as far as 4 miles in the training program, including uphill and into the wind and sand on the beach.
And hey! I once danced the samba for 7 miles, dammit! I scaled Mount Fuji in a typhoon! I've fled in terror from a 2,000 pound bull! I can stand 30 minutes worth of jogging with a crowd of 300+ people, right?
Somehow, though, the idea is worrying me. (It doesn't help that Carol is running the 10-miler on the same course, starting 7 miles behind me. If she catches up to me, not as unthinkable as most people may think, I'll be mortified)
My only goal is to finish, though. I'll worry about how long it takes me to finish at the next race. (See, see, I'm already planning to run another! That's good, isn't it?)
Thank goodness for iPods, though. I've found that my iPod is the best way to ensure I don't think about how much pain I'm in. Got some inspirational music on there (theme to Superman, the movie, "Celebration" by Kool and the Gang, and stuff like that) With it, I'm sure I'll cross the finish line.
How will I feel the next day? that's a whole 'nother question.

Mon, 18 Apr 2005 14:56:13 GMT

This city has the ability to ruin absolutely everything.
We get a baseball team, something that should be a joyous event, right? So what do the police do? They decide two nights before the first baseball game that they're going to re-zone all of the streets in our neighborhood. And if you don't have a brand new zoning sticker the night of the game, they're going to tow your car from in front of your house.
Now normally, I wouldn't mind not having baseball suburbanites cruising around the neighborhood looking for free parking. But giving us 2 days to get a sticker before getting towed is a little much. And how did they they tell us about this new zoning? A letter perhaps? A flyer in the mailboxes? Radio announcements?
NONE OF THE ABOVE.
They didn't tell us. The only way I found out about this was that my next door neighbor, a law student, happened to be at home when the signs went up, and went out to ask. She then e-mailed the neighborhood and we all rushed down to get stickers.
Luckily, I got stickers for all three vehicles, but now I have to get the Mustang fixed because the sticker's invalid if you don't have city plates and inspection stickers. I never changed the Mustang from the permanent Mississippi classic plates.
ARGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH.
I don't have time for this. But I guess I'll make time today. It's my fault for letting the Mustang just sit around for the last year. Now I have to pay money to get it towed to a Mustang restoration shop, where it'll be about a year before they can get around to it.
ARRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH.
(It would be a lot better if I hadn't gone down to Daytona Beach on the COLDEST day of the spring so far. Everyone kept saying, "But it was so beautiful last week!" as I struggled through 30 MPH winds to buy hooded sweatshirts just to be able to go out to the beach).

Sigh. I feel better now. Must go get car taken care of.

UPDATE:
After spending from 11 a.m. through 2:30 p waiting on tow truck, inflating tires and finding appropriate keys, the Mustang is now safely parked at the Mustang restoration shop. I won't see it again until it's running and ready to be registered and properly titled. The house just doesn't look the same now without it.
Will take any ideas on how to make parking officials' lives a living hell now.

Tue, 12 Apr 2005 19:13:21 GMT

I had to share this...

I'm sitting in a press conference with Arlen Specter, who is losing his hair because of chemotherapy for his Hodgkin's disease. I am, (with my freshly shaved head, btw), sitting in the front row directly in front of him, when he stops talking about the Patriot Act and goes down this tangent:

"I have been debating whether I should shave my head or not," Specter said. "I've decided not to, but nature may answer that for me. Every day I take a look, and as I get another one of these torture treatments -- talk about torture -- you ought to get one of these torture treatments."

He then looks me directly in the eyes and said, "So every day I look at it and I'm closer to your situation."
The reporters in the room laugh.

Specter goes on: "I'll never be as good looking as you, but one part of our anatomy will probably be pretty close the next time I appear here."

Okey-dokey.

Tue, 29 Mar 2005 16:40:46 GMT

So, I'm sitting at our downtown office watching television when one of our secretaries transfers a call to me. It's this guy who wants to know the name of the woman Michael Schiavo has been living with for the last few years.
I politely tell him that I don't know the name of the woman, and suggest he call a newspaper in Florida.
He then starts this rant over why the media hasn't reported that Mr. Schiavo is an adulterer, and that Terri Schiavo could live if she just filed for divorce.
I say, "excuse me, sir. I don't think Mrs. Schiavo has filed for anything over the last 15 years. And if the media hasn't reported that Schiavo is living with another woman, where did you hear it?"
He goes: "Uhh, I heard it on TV."
I say: "Thank you for your call, and have a nice day." Click.
Sigh. I love the public.

What made me think of this? This true story from a 911 tape in California:

Dispatcher: Sheriff's department, how can I help you?

Woman: Yeah, I'm over here . . . I'm over here at Burger King right here in San Clemente.*

Dispatcher: Uh-huh.

Woman: Um, no, not San Clemente; I'm sorry, I live in San Clemente. I'm in Laguna Niguel, I think, that's where I'm at.

Dispatcher: Uh-huh.

Woman: I'm at a drive-through right now.

Dispatcher: Uh-huh.

Woman: I went . . . I ordered my food three times. They're mopping the floor inside, and I understand they're busy . . . they're not even busy, okay, I've been the only car here. I asked them four different times to make me a Western Barbeque Burger. Okay, they keep giving me a hamburger with lettuce, tomato, and cheese, onions, and I said, "I'm not leaving . . ."

Dispatcher: Uh-huh.

Woman: I want a Western Burger because I just got my kids from Tae Kwon Do, they're hungry, I'm on my way home, and I live in San Clemente.

Dispatcher: Uh-huh.

Woman: Okay . . . she said, she gave me another hamburger; it's wrong. I said four times, I said, "I want it to go. Can you go out and park in front?" I said, "No, I want my hamburger right." So then the . . . the lady came to the manager. She . . . well whoever she is, she came up and she said, um, she said, um, "Do you want your money back?" And I said, "No, I want my hamburger. My kids are hungry and I have to jump on that toll freeway." I said, "I am not leaving this spot," and I said, "I will call the police," because I want my Western Burger done right! Now is that so hard?

Dispatcher: Okay, what exactly is it you want us to do for you?

Woman: I . . . send an officer down here. I . . . I want them to make me . . .

Dispatcher: Ma'am, we're not gonna go down there and enforce your Western Bacon Cheeseburger.

Woman: What am I supposed to do?

Dispatcher: This is . . . this is between you and the manager. We're not gonna go and enforce how to make a hamburger; that's not a criminal issue. There's . . . there's nothing criminal there.

Woman: So I just stand here . . . so I just sit here and [block]?

Dispatcher: You . . . you need to calmly and rationally speak to the manager and figure out what to do between you.

Woman: She did come up, and I said, "Can I please have my Western Burger?" She . . . she said, "I'm not dealing with it," and she walked away. Because they're mopping the floor, and it's also the fact that they don't want to . . . they don't want to go through there . . . and . . . and . . .

Dispatcher: Ma'am, then I suggest you get your money back and go somewhere else. This is . . . this is not a criminal issue. We can't go out there and make them make you a cheeseburger the way you want it.

Woman: Well . . . that is . . . that . . . you're supposed to be here to protect me.

Dispatcher: Well, what are we protecting you from, a wrong cheeseburger?

Woman: No . . .

Dispatcher: Is this like . . . is this a harmful cheeseburger or something? I don't understand what you want us to do.

Woman: Just come down here. I'm not . . . I'm not leaving.

Dispatcher: No ma'am, I'm not sending the deputies down there over a cheeseburger. You need to go in there and act like an adult and either get your money back or go home.

Woman: She is not acting like an adult herself! I'm sitting here in my car; I just want them to make my kids a . . . a Western Burger.

Dispatcher: Ma'am, this is what I suggest: I suggest you get your money back from the manager and you go on your way home.

Woman: Okay.

Dispatcher: Okay? Bye-bye.

Thu, 24 Feb 2005 18:07:51 GMT

every once in a while, I run across Web sites that I just have to share.

www.gullible.com (they swear every fact is true)

February 24, 2005

• Aldrich Hutchins, was born in 1943, with 18 toes, more toes than any other person on record.

• Blue pens outnumber black pens by a four to three margin.

• Watermelons have an odd number of seeds 82 percent of the time.

• Worldwide, four out of five English speakers don't know the difference between "affect" and "effect."

• 79 percent of the world's population has never used a computer.

February 23, 2005

• 78 percent of bird species do not associate in groups, casting doubt on the adage, "birds of a feather flock together."

• Worldwide, most people get their hair cut every 6.2 weeks.

• Chalk dust is the number one cause of allergic reactions among teachers.

• The average person infected with the flu will spread it to nine people.

• Every year, the Halloween season sees an 11 percent increase in the sale of toilet paper.

February 22, 2005

• One in six Irish-Americans has spent a night in jail, compared to one in nine non-Irish.

• The idea of using music to communicate with extraterrestrials in "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" came from 1960s-era anthropological experiments attempting to communicate with culturally insulated tribes using music.

• The role of Don Vito Corleone in "The Godfather" was written for Spencer Tracy.

• The most feared of the Gestapo inquisition squads was run by a man named Jurgen Grump. Captain Grump personally carried out over 70 raids on perceived dens of insurgency before he himself was hanged for treason in 1938.

• Bolivia is the only South American country that does not export tobacco products to the United States.

Wed, 23 Feb 2005 20:27:37 GMT

I had a Bree Van DeKamp moment when I read this. Poor Rex better watch out for what he asks for ...

ANCHORAGE, Alaska (AP) _ A woman upset about an impending breakup with her boyfriend cut off his penis and flushed it down a toilet, police said. Utility workers recovered the severed organ, and surgeons reattached it.

Kim Tran, 35, was arraigned on charges of assault, domestic violence and tampering with evidence. She remained jailed in Anchorage, with no bail set.
Police spokeswoman Anita Shell said the injury to the 44-year-old man was "brutal, brutal."

The couple was arguing Saturday because the man, whose name was not released, wanted to end the year-old relationship, Shell said. The pair decided to have sex, and the man agreed to have his arms tied to a window handle above their bed. The woman pulled out a kitchen knife and severed his penis, police said.

After flushing the organ down the toilet, she drove the man to the hospital and helped him to a nurses' station, Shell said. Police, summoned by a hospital worker, found Tran at the couple's home cleaning up the blood, Shell said.

Water utility workers retrieved the penis, and police said surgery to reattach it was successful.

Tue, 22 Feb 2005 20:09:35 GMT

It's a slow day, so I thought I'd play along with Yahtzee63. Here's my list:

Ten Things I've Done Other People Might Not Have

1. Played a carillon on New Year's Eve at 3 a.m.
2. Been warned to evacuate the side of Japan's Mount Fuji because of a typhoon.
3. Been inside the Oval Office with a U.S. president.
4. Witnessed a state-sanctioned double execution.
5. Been cursed at by a major author for not reading her books, and upon cursing her later in the day, found out the person I was talking to was her grandson.
6. Been a passenger aboard Air Force One.
7. Hit the head of the Drug Enforcement Agency in the head with a golf ball.
8. Voluntarily got aboard a shrimping vessel and sailed out during an Atlantic Coast hurricane.
9. Danced the samba for seven miles as part of a Mardi Gras parade
10. Been hugged (and purred at, by request) by Eartha Kitt

ricin

Fri, 06 Feb 2004 21:54:46 GMT

I'm not dead.
Didn't get chance to get a good, ricin-filled breath this time, but what a way to spend a week...They actually called me in piano class Monday night to go back to the Capitol in case people were falling out dead.
But all clear on this end. No Cipro for me this time!
Will be sending more Hawaii pictures, and some piano recitals pictures soon!

Mon, 27 Oct 2003 18:44:38 GMT

So, I've decided to expose Carol to the Ole Miss-Miss. State rivalry by taking her down to Starkville on Thanksgiving Day for the football game. That should be pretty interesting, don't you think? She's never really experienced anything like the Rebels-Bulldogs rivalry (Army-Navy doesn't count, the cadets and midshipmen don't really get to enjoy those games, I hear.) If it wasn't in Starkville, I'd take her out to the Grove, Handy Andy's, the Gin and a couple of places like that, but since it's in Starkville, any suggestions for giving her the whole Egg Bowl experience?

Three recommendations...

Mon, 20 Oct 2003 20:36:29 GMT

As I get ready to do my whirlwind coast-to-coast tour(Austin, Nov. 8, Los Angeles Nov. 14, Mississippi Nov. 23, Boston Dec. 4, NYC Dec. 5, and then NYC again, Dec. 16...whew) I have three recommendations for you guys.
1. Netflix. much better than Blockbuster and they've had every single movie I've wanted to watch on DVD, including School Daze, Dangerous Liasons and Get on the Bus. It is $20 a month, and you can only get three at a time but I joined on Thursday and the movies were in my mailbox on Friday. Pretty good service, if you ask me. You do have to know what you want to watch in advance, but who doesn't know what movies they want to see?!
2. The Da Vinci Code. read it. That's all I'll say.
3. Duck Dodgers...If you haven't watched it yet, do so! The last episode was "The Green Lootern" when Duck Dodgers finds a Green Lantern ring when his and Hal Jordan's laundry gets mixed up in at the cleaners and he has to save the Green Lantern Corps from Sinestro...guest voices, Kevin Smith, Michael Dorn, John de Lancie, John DiMaggio, Tara Strong, to name a few. I almost died laughing ...

Sirius is dead?

Sat, 04 Oct 2003 14:59:01 GMT

Just finished OOTP...they killed Sirius?! He's just about the only adult in that book that I really liked! ARRRGHHH!

Ok, I'm calm now.
Here's today's "What the hell were they thinking?" story from Columbia, Tenn.

Man and woman jailed for having sex on lawn
By WESLEY BUSH/Staff Writer

A man and a woman were arrested for allegedly having sex on the front lawn of their home, police said.

Dan Gilchrist, 45, of 711 Lookout Drive, and Paula Parris, 44, were charged with public intoxication and indecent exposure Monday after a neighbor called 911 and said the couple was openly having intercourse on the lawn of Gilchrist's Columbia home.

Gilchrist was also charged with disorderly conduct after repeatedly disrupting bond proceedings.

Shortly after 3 p.m., 911 dispatchers received a call from a man complaining of a couple naked in the front yard of their home. Several minutes later, he called again saying the two were engaging in sexual acts.

"There's a man and woman out in the yard," the caller said. "She's out there nude, and I don't know what's going on. They're having sex out here, and people are running by."

When police arrived, they found the couple on the ground.

"I walked up and saw officer Voss talking to the male who had on nothing but underwear and the female was in the truck with a pink tanktop-like shirt on," Deputy Howard Mangrum wrote in his report. "She was bottomless with a gray sweater over herself."

Police found two bottles of vodka in the yard and took the couple into custody

Thu, 02 Oct 2003 13:38:53 GMT

I knew I loved Chic-Fil-A for a reason:
http://www.qsrmagazine.com/drive-thru/2003/charts/final.html

Mobile again!

Thu, 25 Sep 2003 17:45:22 GMT

Got my car back last night, and it's mobile again! Cost about $600, but they've got me back driving again...but I decided to take the bus in again this morning anyway. It gets me here on time, I don't have to worry about traffic and I get to read a book on the way in. There aren't many downsides. It only costs about $2.40 a day, much cheaper than gas, and is much more relaxing. And in the evening I can walk to Carol's house if I don't want to wait on the bus. The only catch is I can't really do it from my house. I guess I could drive to Carol's, park my car, and take the bus from there, but if I'm going to drive part way, I might as well drive the rest of the way. Hmmm. But at least I had three days of a peaceful commute, and I can actually go shopping this weekend without having to hitch a ride with someone.

Isabel Redux

Mon, 22 Sep 2003 18:24:28 GMT

I finally got power back Saturday night! Yay! But at that point I was so comfortable at Carol's house, I just decided to stay there for the rest of the weekend(It's going to a permanent home for me sooner or later anyway!)
However, in a moment of sheer stupidity, I got distracted while driving on Sunday morning and careened my car into a large curb, totally destroying the front right tire and according to my mechanic, bending the car's frame. Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad. Thousands of dollars to repair. They say for $600 they may get it to where I can drive it again, but no guarantees. I'm hoping that's true(I've already told them that I'm not going to let them do the full work, so they have no incentive to screw with me.)
I was hoping the 240sx would last a couple of more years, but I'm not going to put major money back into it again.
Arrrrrgh.
But at least nothing's flooded and I have my computer and DirecTv back again...